Reality

I think my life's interesting
But really it's not
Delusion, deception, whatever
I rot

The things in my head
Never make it to my real life
Can't find the connection
Even with all my might

Dreams of writing
Stay stored away
Cuz I curse myself daily
For my true "every day"

Depression and fear
Become prison for me
As I wade thru the slugs
That won't let me see

I can't shake this feeling
That I'm supposed to do more
Frozen in a body
That most people deplore

It's keeping me down
Binding my hands
Despite my best efforts
Derailed with a slam

Unfortunate sadness
Some days muddle thru
But the starkness of reality
Just makes me feel blue

Inside I still wonder
And hope for breakthrough
That someday I'll muster
The will to shine through